Sunday, October 23, 2011

Trick-or-Treat?

I've been so busy with work & school lately that I really don't go out that often anymore. Last night was the first night I went out in almost a month.. I was so excited to go out but once I got there, I remembered why I don't like going to parties anymore.. I feel so distant from everybody.. I feel like everybody has their somebody, except me..& it just makes me miss Matt soooooo much more than what I already do.. I'm 19..I don't want to turn into a homebody yet but I hate this feeling.. Maybe I need to make some new friends & start going out with different people? I'm not saying I'm gonna drop these friends or anything but maybe make some friends that don't always remind me of Matt? I don't know..

Last night was a costume party.. I went as an eskimo! But with Halloween approaching, I've been thinking.. Matt & I have not shared a Halloween together yet & we wont until we're married.. We met in Jan. 2010 & he left in Oct. 2010 for bootcamp, just 4 days before Halloween! I know Halloween isn't really a big deal & I know that if he were here, the thought wouldn't even cross my mind but it's the fact that he's not here & that he wont be here for the next 4 years & I can't help but think about it.. It's crazy to think that we wont spend our first Halloween together until we've been together for 5, almost 6 years..

This was my costume from last night :)

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